Happy Haunted Blog Party

crypts 1

Happy Halloween! It’s time to Use Me and Abuse Me by digging up ONE link from your own blog and burying it in my comment section. Click on a few of them and maybe they’ll stalk you back at your haunt.

Make sure to bring a link to a particular story. Otherwise, they may arrive and not know where to look. You don’t want them to go INTO THE BASEMENT! or INTO THE ATTIC! I doubt they would take a shower, but DON’T GO IN THERE!

BEWARE! Only bring ONE link or you’ll end up in the Chamber of Spam. The vile smell of rot alone could make you ill. You don’t want your headstone to read, “I told you I was sick.”

IF YOU LEAVE A LINK, CLICK ON A FEW! No one likes a witch (or warlock), who fills her cape with goodies and then flies away on her broom.

Tell them, “Susie sent me,” and they should click back to your crypt.

I made some witch’s brew, (my Aunt Helga’s favorite recipe), and the eye of newt stew is bubbling. Help yourself to the deep-fried crow’s feet. The warty toad dip is especially tasty.

on my grave

The crypt keeper 5

 Tell your Facebook and Twitter friends. The more, the SCARIER!

Posted in Use Me and Abuse Me Days | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , , | 94 Comments

HEADS UP! Wild Halloween Party Ahead.

The crypt keeper 3Hey, all you Wild Riders! I’m having a Halloween blog hop on Wednesday. Come with a link from ONE of your blog posts and click on a few. This party should haunt you for days and nights…

It will start at 6:00 AM Mountain Time. Please come and Use Me and Abuse Me! Meet my ghoulish friends. Maybe they’ll follow you home…

Spine-tingling yours,the crypt keeper 4

See you Wednesday…

Posted in Use Me and Abuse Me Days | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 25 Comments

It Was A-Maizing!

corn mazeMy obsession with mazes began as a child. I remember trying to find my way through them on paper and having a difficult time. I’ve always been directionally challenged.

maze

When I discovered a great corn maze was located down the road from our house, my husband, Danny, and I had to go.

They should call them, Maize Mazes, don’t you think?

corn maze 2

The first photo was taken at the entrance. We cut through that corn field to the maze where tall stalks of corn swallowed any ambient light. Without the moon to guide us, it was pitch black. Picking up our feet was a necessity. For as many people who lined up for tickets, we met very few inside this vast corn crop.

We wove and wended our way by taking many wrong turns and hitting a lot of dead ends.

corn maze 1

It was super creepy and very Children of the Corn-like. Stephen King wrote the short story on which the movie was based. No surprise there. What was surprising? It was published in Penthouse.

220px-ChildrenoftheCornPoster

 Yes. I am still getting my creepy on

Would you be brave enough to walk through a corn maze or haunted house?

 

Posted in Life, Photography | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 73 Comments

Seven Ways to Thrill Me!

thrillers

How long has it been since you read a real page-turner? A while? Yeah. Me too. I think that’s why I love watching thrillers. They are the ultimate in creating and sustaining suspense. Talk about tight writing. They race ahead with twisted turns in a world where you’re hooked into finding out what happens to the characters or who survives.

My heart simultaneously leaps with the evil guy who comes into view behind his latest victim in the dreary, deserted park. “Turn around. Turn Around! TURN AROU… Oh, never mind. Too late.” I slump down in my seat, heart hammering in my chest like I ran a 100 yard dash.

I’m not a slasher or horror movie watcher although they can be thrillers too. I couldn’t get through Nick Cage’s Drive Angry, although I loved the creepy, alien-like quality of the accountant played by William Fitchner. It was too violent for me. Silence of the Lambs haunted my nightmares for years.

I love the white knuckle-busting, heart-tapping, “Oh my God, He’s in the house!” terror. Continue reading

Posted in Humor | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 43 Comments

Getting My Creepy On!

Desiccated leaves, dismembered from branches, rot in the dying light and crunch like brittle bones under my boots. The wind whispers ghostly verses of songs sung long ago. Halloween is approaching. It’s time to get your creepy on.

“How do I do that?” you may ask. Sometimes eating candy corn and slaying a few pumpkins isn’t enough. Summerlike weather may defy the season or you feel like you’re too old for the holiday.

Watch thriller movies.

Freaky movies like Single White Female starring Bridget Fonda, Jennifer Jason Leigh, and Steven Weber will get you in the mood. I twitched for hours afterward while sending quick glances over my shoulder. I half expected my husband, Danny, to come home with my identical haircut and color. It’s one of those movies where you want to shout, “Get out of the house, NOW! NO! DON’T GO DOWN IN THE BASEMENT! NOOOO!”

BONUS – It’s a great cardio work out without breaking a sweat.

single white female

Decorate indoors. 

Before I became obsessed with writing, I collected antiques on the weekends. Found objects are perfect for creepy Halloween decor. Old framed photos, black containers, and silver candlesticks highlight the season. Don’t polish the silver! The tarnish adds to the effect. I know. You’re welcome.

creepy Halloween decor

Sticky spider webs are not for me. I don’t want to find them months later. Instead, I use cheesecloth, cut the edges and rip holes by shredding it with my fingers. Continue reading

Posted in Humor, Life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 71 Comments

An Open Letter From My Boobs

Dear Susie Lindau,

For thirteen months, we’ve hung out in our new residence behind your pectoral muscles. It has taken us a while to get used to the cramped quarters, but we are adjusting. We understand you are trying to make us feel at home. Although, we totally appreciate the effort, sometimes, you freak us out.

First of all, why do you grab us every time you tell someone about your double boobectomy? The shock alone turns our silicone hearts to ice. One minute we’re chillin’ while you’re yammering on with a friend, an acquaintance, or some random person you just met. Then you snatch us in fists so tight, well, it’s disturbing. We understand you like to talk with your hands, but quit feeling us up.

grabbing my boobs

You are pretty insensitive. We are adopted. We know you miss your old boobs. We will never replace them, but we’re doing our best. Could you at least stop complaining about how weird we feel? You’ve been told the odd feeling will go away. We were there. Remember? Continue reading

Posted in Boob Reports | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 112 Comments

Friday Photo – 27th Anniversary!

27th anniversary

It’s been a Wild adventure. We fell in love in Telluride and this shot was taken there twenty-seven years later. Life has its stormy weather, but sunshine always follows. Having someone to share a glorious rainbow makes the moment super special!

Are you planning anything special this weekend?

 

Posted in Life | Tagged , , , , , , , , , | 74 Comments

Bike Hike to Bridal Veil Falls – Photo Essay with Altitude

trail to Bridal Veil

Danny and I fell in love at the Telluride Bluegrass Festival twenty-seven years ago. We hadn’t been back. It takes seven hours to drive to this very special Colorado locale. It was worth every hour.

Trail 2

We biked from town into the box canyon. We planned to bike and then hike to the top of Bridal Veil Falls. I stopped every few hundred yards to take photographs.

Telluride trail to waterfallWe rode to the parking lot at the bottom of the mountain.

Danny bikingBiking on the road would get steep. Continue reading

Posted in Life, Photography | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , | 89 Comments

To Hell You Ride – A Photo Essay that Ends in Whoa!

Telluride 2

Danny and I took a trip to Telluride, Colorado last weekend.

Telluride 1

It had been warm in Southern Colorado and the fall color hadn’t hit its peak.

Telluride 3

A light dusting of snow on the mountains made a nice contrasting backdrop.

Telluride 4

There were breathtaking views everywhere we looked.

Telluride 8

And then this happened!

Telluride 6

And that!

Telluride 7

Pretty spectacular. It inspired my new quote:

“Roadblocks can be hurdled, but detours take you on a new road to solving a problem and can provide an amazing view.”

Happy October to you! What’s your favorite season?

 

Posted in Photography | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 97 Comments

Want More Followers? Use Me and Abuse Me – Colorful Colorado Edition

Eaglesmere1

Hello Wild Riders! If you would like more blog followers, here’s your chance.

Every writer loves to watch their blog grow. But it’s tough when bloggers we have followed for a while take a break or stop posting. Comments and views dwindle. Although new readers follow our blogs every day, we need to bring them back. How do we do that? COMMUNITY. We build it through reaching out and connecting with them. We get to know them through reading their blogs, leaving comments, and following them on social media.

Here’s your chance to build your own community. Use Me and Abuse Me while virtually partying down with my friends in the comment section!

Bring a link from ONE of your blog posts and promote it briefly in my comment section. Click on a few of my friend’s links and check out their digs. Hang out for a while. Get acquainted. Leave a comment and tell them, “Susie sent me.” They should click back to your place. Then come back to the party and click on a few more. The more you click, the more fun you’ll have!

  • Do not leave a link to one of your friend’s posts. They won’t come back to party with us. It’s no fun to knock on a door and wait…and wait…and wait…….It ruins the atmosphere.
  • Do not leave your link and run without clicking on a few. This is a major party foul.
  • Leave ONE link. Two will send you into my spam filter and that is always so embarrassing for both of us.

So have a blast meeting my friends. They are the best in the blogosphere!

My son, DJ Kelly Smash, is in the house and he’ll be dropping the bass. He’s used to ragers on my blog, so come back anytime. This party usually lasts for days.

The bar is stocked and the barista can make any coffee drink imaginable. She’s amazing! The buffet is filled with pastries and delectable treats flown in from around the world. Sit back relax and click to meet my friends. Oh yeah and don’t forget to DANCE!  

PLEASE SHARE! Let’s make this party the biggest ever! 

Posted in Use Me and Abuse Me Days | Tagged , , , , , , , , , , , | 178 Comments