Start the New Year With a Revolution!

My daughter, Courtney, noticed a few ignorant people on social media replaced New Year’s Resolutions with New Year’s Revolutions. It made me think. (Keep in mind, I’m still on Oxycodone after my surgery last Monday.) Revolutions might be a better word!

sunburst over earth

 

First of all, the Earth “revolves” around the Sun in one year’s time. The start of the New Year begins after a complete revolution.

We all want to make changes or reach goals in our lives. You don’t? Wow. Lucky you. I think the promises we make on New Year’s Eve are closer to revolutions than resolutions since they require a huge change in our lives. Oh sure. If your only goal in 2015 is to take more vacations, I wouldn’t call that a revolution. But if you want to make a lifestyle change, that my friend, will take a revolution. Continue reading

Becoming New and Improved Bionically in 2015

This photo was taken in Jackson Hole, Wyoming my senior year in college. Yep. That’s me with the bota bag. Remember those? My friend and I stayed with ski bums who worked on the mountain as ski hosts. Little did I know drinking while skiing could be a very bad idea. I would face surgery becoming even more bionic thirty years later.

Mistakes were made Jackson Hole

I thought my hairstyle was a good idea because… Continue reading

How To Go Viral On Reddit or The Ironic Complaint

The last day of 2014 was WILD. I blogged a post complaining about my year-end stats. They were identical to 2013’s. By 8:00 AM, I had 200 views. I thought the title, “I Predict More Stories About Boobs in 2015,” reeled them in. Nope. Someone shared an old post on Reddit and it went viral!

went viral on Reddit

Singing Happy Birthday Could Be Risky Business – $10,000 Worth, blew up. Why? That post is two years old.

I scrolled down to referrers and Reddit was at the top of the list. Reddit? I’ve never gotten a view from Reddit. When I refreshed my blog, I had over 1000 views! I freaked out and updated the post inviting new readers to my “Home” page.

From there it went to 5000 views an hour for about seven hours and then it tapered off.

You probably can’t see the computer screen with all your eye rolling. “Good for you Susie. Who freakin’ cares.”

Before you click away, read on… You want to go viral, right? Continue reading

I Predict More Stories About Boobs in 2015

Every year, I try to beat my numbers from the last. I thought 2014 blew past 2013 and I’d say, “So long sucker!” while smirking at it in the rear view mirror. More followers + more blog posts = more views. That’s logical, right? Pshh!

Here’s what WordPress sent me this year.

The concert hall at the Sydney Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 49,000 times in 2014. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 18 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

I checked out my 2013 report and guess what? My blog was visited 49,000 times that year too! That’s the exact same stinkin’ performance at the Sydney Opera House two years running. I came up short. GAH!

What do I have to do to hit 50,000?

WordPress figured I would be bummed. Those crazy monkeys suggested I write new posts about the topics which scored huge views.

I scrambled through my stats. What was most popular in 2014? Boobs! Of course! NOTE TO SELF: Write more posts about boobs. Everybody loves boobs. Continue reading

Happy Haunted Blog Party

crypts 1

Happy Halloween! It’s time to Use Me and Abuse Me by digging up ONE link from your own blog and burying it in my comment section. Click on a few of them and maybe they’ll stalk you back at your haunt.

Make sure to bring a link to a particular story. Otherwise, they may arrive and not know where to look. You don’t want them to go INTO THE BASEMENT! or INTO THE ATTIC! I doubt they would take a shower, but DON’T GO IN THERE!

BEWARE! Only bring ONE link or you’ll end up in the Chamber of Spam. The vile smell of rot alone could make you ill. You don’t want your headstone to read, “I told you I was sick.”

IF YOU LEAVE A LINK, CLICK ON A FEW! No one likes a witch (or warlock), who fills her cape with goodies and then flies away on her broom.

Tell them, “Susie sent me,” and they should click back to your crypt.

I made some witch’s brew, (my Aunt Helga’s favorite recipe), and the eye of newt stew is bubbling. Help yourself to the deep-fried crow’s feet. The warty toad dip is especially tasty.

on my grave

The crypt keeper 5

 Tell your Facebook and Twitter friends. The more, the SCARIER!

To Hell You Ride – A Photo Essay that Ends in Whoa!

Telluride 2

Danny and I took a trip to Telluride, Colorado last weekend.

Telluride 1

It had been warm in Southern Colorado and the fall color hadn’t hit its peak.

Telluride 3

A light dusting of snow on the mountains made a nice contrasting backdrop.

Telluride 4

There were breathtaking views everywhere we looked.

Telluride 8

And then this happened!

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And that!

Telluride 7

Pretty spectacular. It inspired my new quote:

“Roadblocks can be hurdled, but detours take you on a new road to solving a problem and can provide an amazing view.”

Happy October to you! What’s your favorite season?

 

Want More Followers? Use Me and Abuse Me – Colorful Colorado Edition

Eaglesmere1

Hello Wild Riders! If you would like more blog followers, here’s your chance.

Every writer loves to watch their blog grow. But it’s tough when bloggers we have followed for a while take a break or stop posting. Comments and views dwindle. Although new readers follow our blogs every day, we need to bring them back. How do we do that? COMMUNITY. We build it through reaching out and connecting with them. We get to know them through reading their blogs, leaving comments, and following them on social media.

Here’s your chance to build your own community. Use Me and Abuse Me while virtually partying down with my friends in the comment section!

Bring a link from ONE of your blog posts and promote it briefly in my comment section. Click on a few of my friend’s links and check out their digs. Hang out for a while. Get acquainted. Leave a comment and tell them, “Susie sent me.” They should click back to your place. Then come back to the party and click on a few more. The more you click, the more fun you’ll have!

  • Do not leave a link to one of your friend’s posts. They won’t come back to party with us. It’s no fun to knock on a door and wait…and wait…and wait…….It ruins the atmosphere.
  • Do not leave your link and run without clicking on a few. This is a major party foul.
  • Leave ONE link. Two will send you into my spam filter and that is always so embarrassing for both of us.

So have a blast meeting my friends. They are the best in the blogosphere!

My son, DJ Kelly Smash, is in the house and he’ll be dropping the bass. He’s used to ragers on my blog, so come back anytime. This party usually lasts for days.

The bar is stocked and the barista can make any coffee drink imaginable. She’s amazing! The buffet is filled with pastries and delectable treats flown in from around the world. Sit back relax and click to meet my friends. Oh yeah and don’t forget to DANCE!  

PLEASE SHARE! Let’s make this party the biggest ever!