‘Twas the day after Christmas and all through the house,
Not a creature was stirring, the family was out.
Woke up at 6:00. Left @ 6:30 – Gone Shreddin. Love Kelly. Call meh for da plan. High 4!
The stockings were emptied, what remained were the hooks,
The only memory of Santa had been read in books. Continue reading
Filed under Humor, Life, Photography
This was the sunrise on the auspicious morning of The End of Days. Did you hear that? Never mind. It was just my stomach rumbling.
Was it a surprise to you that the Mayans got it wrong? Hey. Look at the bright side. All of those dehydrated food packages you bought won’t go bad.
Doomsayers have been predicting the end of the world since it was in its infant stage. Every time a volcano erupted or the Earth shook they ran for cover. Isn’t that what Henny Penny squawked about? “The sky is falling! The sky is falling!”
She should be wearing a pith helmet.
Why would anyone relish the idea of the world coming to an end?
#1. They can’t take another season of Dancing with the Stars.
I am not a fan either, but really, you could just turn off the TV.
From Wikimedia Commons
#2. They won’t have to finish their Christmas shopping.
The real doomsday will come when you have nothing for your wife on Christmas morning.
#3. They can relate to this cat.
#4. They have taken Walking Dead a little too seriously and want to star in their own reality TV show.
#5. The idea of taking down all of those Christmas lights is overwhelming.
#6. They believe that the number 13 is unlucky and their compulsive nature won’t allow them to write 2013 on their checks.
Jeez! Who writes checks?
#7. Not having to worry about hair and makeup would be a welcome relief.
A Wild Hair day on the Wild Ride.
#8. They want to try out all of the Zombie Survival Gear they bought on Amazon.
#9. They have to be right all of the time and can’t wait to say, “I told you so.”
Come on. Where is the satisfaction in gloating if we all die?
#10. They have climbed Everest, won the Iron Man competition, and want to compete in the ultimate challenge.
Now you can face the challenge of surviving my blog in 2013!
Filed under Humor, Life, Photography
The cards have been sent with 20 cents extra postage, the stockings are hanging perilously close to our gas fireplace, and I ate a dozen of the cookies I baked for the last exchange of the season. Tonight I am basking in the twinkling light emanating from all of the decorations inside my house while the electric meter is whirring outside in the bitter cold.
On the 6th night before Christmas, there are presents to be wrapped, but I can finally take a deep breath and relax. As I sip my first cup of tea, a memory of a Christmas from long ago swirls back from the past.
Kelly was five-weeks-old. Danny and I lived in a Boulder apartment on the third floor with outdoor steps. It had snowed and kept snowing. It was three days before Christmas and we would fly back to Madison, Wisconsin to celebrate the holidays with our families. Our flight would take off at 4:00 PM. Continue reading
Filed under Humor, Life, Photography
It is so much fun to point, shoot and instantly post your photographs on Facebook or Twitter. I really enjoy seeing them, but there are some pretty gawdawful pictures out there. Let me help you banish the bleak, delete the delinquent, and take a better photo this holiday season. Your friends and family won’t be horrified when they find themselves tagged in snapshots with enormous faces or bodies that are freakishly distorted.
Don’t be the overexposed “big nose” this holiday season. Right Roxy?
Ten Tips for taking better pictures: Continue reading
Filed under Humor, Inspiration, Life, Photography
First of all, Happy Holidays to everyone out there in the blogosphere!
After all the drawing, printing, folding, cutting, and pasting, I am happy to say that my Christmas cards are finished. Whew!
They are a little different this year. They are a modified pop-up and more like a fold-up.
Step 1: Fill coffee mug. Use up entire red ink cartridge. Punch out trees. Refill coffee mug. Continue reading
Filed under Humor, Inspiration, Life, Photography
One of my annual holiday traditions is creating our family Christmas card. In the last couple of days, I have drawn and copied, cut, folded and stacked all of the parts that will be ready to glue and assemble. With around 24 hours into this art project, I would guess that I am just about half way to finishing them. I am hoping to make 90 cards. I know. I am ridiculous.
This year’s card is another pop-up, meaning there will be folded paper inside that will have some dimension after opening. Last year, I added beads and half of the envelopes were returned before Christmas with postage due. Ugh. This year, I avoided any extra dingle dangles that would mess up the otherwise timely delivery.
Last year’s card. Those beads cost me!
Another pop-up from two years before.
I thought it would be fun to run a contest for those of you interested in receiving one of my homemade cards. No matter what your faith or how you celebrate, this is a card made with lots of love for you! Continue reading
Filed under Humor, Inspiration, Life
Do I look terrified or what? My sister escaped!
Let me start out by clarifying that I love the idea of Santa Claus as the embodiment of joy and generosity for children around the world. But it was the department store Santa with the nasty cigarette and coffee breath I endured for the sake of the obligatory traditional McCartan photo every Christmas. Continue reading
Filed under Humor, Life, Photography
When you think about how many films you have viewed during your lifetime, have you ever wondered why some remain timeless? They can be watched over and over again without losing their impact.
It’s a Wonderful Life is one of my favorites. Somehow this Christmas tale produced and directed by Frank Capra has kept its relevance every year since it was released in 1947. It still is #1 on the American Movie Institute’s list of most inspirational films. The movie is based on a short story written in 1939 by Philip Van Doren Stern called The Christmas Gift.
I am about to start on my last rewrite of my novel and examined this movie in a completely different way. Not as a movie-goer, but as a writer. I discovered its magic and why it has left audiences spellbound for the last 66 years. Continue reading
Filed under Inspiration, Life
Thanksgiving is a few days away. Can I help you up from the floor? There is a reason why it has crept up so fast. November 22nd is the earliest date possible. The holiday is always celebrated on the fourth Thursday of the month. Every once in a while, another Thursday sneaks in. The good news (and you can usually count on me for that), is there are also five weekends between Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. Yay!
That means we will have several extra days to prepare for the holidays.
There will be…
…time for shopping.
Filed under Humor, Life, Photography
"Susie is such a nice Christmas name. Did you know it was originally Hebrew?"
As I perused today’s newspaper, it occurred to me that I have one of the most cliché names for Christmas. According to Wikipedia, “A cliché or cliche is an expression, idea, or element of an artistic work which has been overused to the point of losing its original meaning or effect, especially when at some earlier time it was considered meaningful or novel.” The name “Susie” is cropping up in holiday advertising everywhere! “A toy for Susie” was on Santa’s list in a print ad along with “an iPod for Timmy.” What could be causing the sudden overuse of my name? Continue reading
Filed under Humor
