Who’s in Your Corner?

Do you have a super fan? Someone who encourages you when you want to quit because you feel like a no-talent nobody? Someone who is always in your corner to support you when you have been punched and are down for the count? Someone who will ask you, “How many fingers do you see?” and then will tell you, “You’re fine! Get back in the ring and fight!” Someone who can see that you’ve been pounded, but not completely out as they hand you an ice pack and rub your sore shoulders?  Someone who can point you back in the direction of your dream when your eyes have swollen shut causing momentary blindness?

Maybe this person is a co-worker, or a fellow writer, or a family member. Maybe they have been a friend for years or someone new in your life, but they always have your back. Everyone stumbles and has those truly hideous moments where they scream, “I suck!” Your super fan will get you a glass of water and calm you down. They will tell you that you do have talent, that it is worth the dedication, and most of all, they will remind you to be patient.

Jack Dempsey’s wife was a super fan

I am thankful to have several super fans; my family, old and new friends and lots of virtual friends. These are the people who encourage me and give me the confidence to get back into the ring and continue writing.

My husband Danny is also a super fan. He has been in my corner every day rooting me on since I began writing in February of 2011. One night he came home after work with a large gift bag . My mind raced to what occasion I could have missed. I reached inside and pulled out a 3-ring binder. I set it on the kitchen counter and opened it up. To my surprise he had filled it with all of my blog posts. He said, “I’ll add new ones to it every week. Some of these comments are great, Susie.”

After a few weeks the binder was filled, so he bought me another. When I mentioned I would like to bring some copies of my posts to my parents, he printed some at his office. My mom and dad are my original super fans.

When I was bummed a couple of weeks ago, Danny pointed out some of the amazing remarks left on my blog and suggested printing them so I could read them when I begin to question my myself. “Focus on those people and what they have said. There’ll always be people out there that will want to hold you back,” he said and gave me a hug. I think this is a great suggestion for everyone. Even if you are not a writer, when someone reassures you, write it down in a journal or create a word document on your computer. Then you can look back on that positive feedback when you are on the ropes and need to motivate for the next round.

Remember you can be a super fan too! You can offer your help, assurance, encouragement, and time. Everyone can use an occasional, “I love it! This is great!” along with an explanation of what struck you as brilliant. There are many talented people out there. I admit to being the exclamation point queen!

So next time you are face down on the mat after someone delivers a knockout punch and you hear a voice above you as they count to ten, remember your super fans. They may not be right there in the ring with you, but they want you to get back up on your feet, take a deep breath, and continue on with the endurance match of a lifetime. They will never throw in the towel because they believe you can do it and you can!

Have you ever felt like throwing in the towel? Has someone helped you back on your feet?

Who is in your corner

Rocky Marciano had a lot of super fans in his corner

For more of Susie’s Wild Ride, click here.

89 thoughts on “Who’s in Your Corner?

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  1. I came here prepared to say that I am lucky: I have a lot of super friends in my corner (including my mom and my wordbitches), but in many ways my online friends who really can convince me. Strange, isn’t it? But they don’t have to encourage me; they choose to, so my bizarre brain thinks what they have to say is more objective.

    I also have a pick-me-up folder (on my desktop) and a real one in my desk drawer.

    Anyway, I came here to say those two things.

    But then I saw that lovely comment Renee made and now I’m a little speechless.

    People are good.

    Thanks for posting this, Susie.

    Like

    1. Leanne you make a great point. No one here “has” to say anything, so when they do make that amazing connection, it means so much.
      I am glad you got to see Renee’s comment! -Lots of great people here!

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  2. this is a wonderful post. thanks Susie. My super fan is my daughter. and some long time friends. And the people in the RWa chapter I founded 8 years ago…and some internet friends.

    I have accepted these people in my life and I forget sometimes to be appreciative for their love, encouragement and support. thanks for the reminder.

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  3. What a great post! I think it is so important to be aware of who your “circle of supporters” are. For me, my mother and my kids are #1 and also my husband. My critique group is amazing, and so are the online writing friends I’ve made.

    I also like your call to be a super fan too. We need to make sure we support the work of others – work we love. People we love.

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  4. It does seem that there are always people who want to hold you back, and it seems the greater the accomplishment, the more of them come out of the woodwork. The part that mystifies me is these people won’t directly address the issue that they don’t want you to succeed in; instead, they use other indirect tactics to do so. Many times they hide under the disguise of friendship! They are everywhere and will come from places you least expect it. (And you won’t expect it because they rarely, if ever, attack from head-on.)

    But there are a few positive people in my corner, and even more if you count the multiple personalities inside my head! :^)

    Good luck to you Susie!

    Like

  5. Mark this is such a great response. I think you are so right. There are always those lurking trying to “put us in our place.” We have to remember our writing community here as a huge support group too!
    PS – Multiple personalities can be a good thing! Hahaha!

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  6. I read this post the day after Thanksgiving, Susie, and it brightened Black Friday. Like you, I’m lucky to have superfans, including my husband, parents, fellow writers, and a handful of former co-workers. I’m grateful to all of them. Thanks for your uplifting post.

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  7. My daughter is my super super fan. and I have a good friend who is also a huge support. And I am blessed with an amazing RWA chapter which is amazing – no politics, no belly aching and amazing support for and from each of us. I am truly blessed. thanks for reminding me to count my blessings.

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  8. I have at least two, and maybe more. My sister, Catherine, and my best friend Rachel. They always encourage me and my sister gives me plenty of the tough love when I need it. My friend and mentor as a poet, Tom Holmes, also probably qualifies. Excellent post, by the way. Your husband sounds like a hell of a guy.

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    1. That is so great that you have such an awesome support system. We all need someone. 🙂
      My husband is amazing and we have been married for almost 25 years! I still can’t believe it since I feel like I am 25 years old! 🙂 Thanks for coming by~

      Like

  9. What a great post! It’s always a great idea to have a super fan. My dad used to be my superfan … my number one super fan. So I guess that’s why I miss him so much. But my four-year old son picks it up where my dad left off. Although his attention span may not always be fantastic 🙂 But he’s still my super fan.

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  10. Susie what a lovely thing for your husband to do.How supportive motivational and… damned gorgeous of him. Mine is too he is my super fan i wouldn’t have it any other way but I would love if he gave me a file like yours. I am glad you did the #ThrowbackThursday .

    Like

    1. Thanks so much, Ellen and for the shares! This is my first #throwbackThursday!
      Danny quit after filling three of them. Ha! When I switched from Salon.com to WordPress they didn’t print out very well. He’s still my super fan after six years! We have to remember, even when our views our down to focus on those who do take the time to read.

      Like

  11. Positive reinforcement and the healing power of super fans. This is evergreen content if I’ve ever read it Susie.
    Thanks for the reminder.

    And it’s even more validating to see that 6 years later, you’re still in the fight…and going strong!

    Like

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