10 Secrets of a Happy Marriage!

My husband, Danny, and I celebrated our 25th anniversary on October 10th. Many have asked, “What’s your secret to a happy marriage?” Here are my Top Ten Secrets!

Secret #1:

You have to be willing to go the extra mile.

I went one thousand miles when moving from Wisconsin to Colorado after our wedding. Danny is the most romantic guy around. He asked me to marry him at the top of the gondola in Aspen after giving me nine plastic rings over the weekend. He continues to surprise me. “Gasp!”

Secret #2:

He’s my best friend and I don’t keep secrets from him.

I can tell him anything, but I can also read his mind when it’s screaming, “That is way too much information, Susie. Sheesh!”

Secret #3.

I can trust him with anything.

But it took years to teach him not to eat the last piece of cake without asking me to split it first. He has also led me on some wild adventures without considering the risks. His faith in me gave me confidence. *gulp*

Susie looking down Whale's Tail

Secret #4.

We have common interests.

I had skied back in Wisconsin but had to learn to keep up in Colorado. We both love outdoor adventures. Our anniversary is being celebrated for a week this year in California. We both agree that the best kind of adventure includes travel!

Secret #5:

Appreciate the differences.

I am philosophical and love to yammer on about life while navel-gazing. I can tell when he has hit the glaze-over stage. My first clue is when he stares at me blankly and hasn’t said anything for over a half an hour. Yes, I occasionally take a breath.

He loves business and has learned to talk fast since I have about three minutes before my mind wanders off. “Wow, look at that butterfly. What? Sure, I was listening.”

Secret #6.

He’s my super fan.

When I first started blogging, he printed out my posts and kept them in a binder. He has total belief in me which inspired Who’s In Your Corner?

We support each other’s hopes and dreams and pick each other up after every disappointment. Often, when I make a mistake, he says, “Aww, that could happen to anyone.”

ref counts down

Secret #7:

Apologize when mistakes are made.

This one is tricky especially since I am always right. Kidding! I think it has more to do with letting things go and developing amnesia.

Secret #8:

We have given up trying to change accept each other for who we are.

He has seen me at my best and worst and still loves me. Who could ask for more?

bad hair day susielindau

Secret #9:

We have the same beliefs and shared dreams for a future together.

In Telluride 25 years ago, I told him my invisible punch list of what I was looking for in a relationship. He agreed with almost everything. He wasn’t so sure about dogs, but our third, Roxy, is his favorite by far.

dog sleeping on back

He has been completely involved in raising our children. They love to talk business with him, thank the Lord! (See Secret #5)

Hanging out on the deck

Secret #10:

The most important factor in having a successful marriage is …..

You gotta have a sense of humor.

We laugh all the time; at ourselves and each other.

When I was pregnant, he used to sing, “Roly Poly, Daddy’s little fatty!” Okay, so I didn’t always find that amusing, but looking back it was funny, kinda.

He’s my muse and in almost every one of my posts. I wrote, KO’d by Karma, after being kicked in the butt for laughing at him, but I learned my lesson, well, not quite yet.

Standing jokes:

We attended an endless mass this summer that included a wedding of some random young couple. The priest said, “Back in the day, many didn’t see their 40th birthday so ‘til death do us part was no big deal. Nowadays, many live to be one hundred years old. You could easily be married for seventy-five years! Seventy-five years! That’s a death sentence for some people.”

While the congregation laughed and the newlyweds looked concerned, Danny looked at me and said, “Fifty more years!”

Here’s a virtual toast to our Wild Ride!

Wedding photo

Our 30th wedding anniversary is coming soon!

Click for more of the Wild Ride.

Related posts:

Oprah and Me!

Our Secret is Out

Who’s in Your Corner?

156 thoughts on “10 Secrets of a Happy Marriage!

Add yours

  1. Thanks for sharing the wisdom – love it! Sense of humor is key, especially when you can laugh at yourself too:) We have two sets of grandparents that made it 65 years and both sets of our parents are 40+ years – AMAZING! Happy Friday & Enjoy Your Weekend!


  2. I’m taking notes! These are some really good tips and it’s obvious that they’ve served you well. Congrats to an amazing couple! Here’s to 50 more years!!


    1. Thanks Audrey! It’s funny how I really didn’t spend much time on this list. They are what I believe helped us and I truly believe in them… especially the humor and forgetfulness!


      1. They’ve become such habit for you, I’m sure. 🙂 And they really do work for maintaining healthy relationships, it’s pretty cool!


    1. Thanks so much and for stopping by Jessica! Sophie is one of the best!
      I find that after 25 years, these are the most important. It’s funny how if we get all of these right, everything else follows!


  3. well, the secret’s out-same as some of those of me and my bride of 47 years! Piece of cake, but it requires communication. Loved the pic at the top. And good luck with the next 50!


  4. What a great post, Susie. I love your tips, and I think you hit the nail on the head with them all. Accepting differences I find to be the most challenging because you start to wonder if it’s a sign of growing apart. Everyone is constantly evolving, and our interests may change over time. So when you stop enjoying the 5-hour fishing trips (yes, I have stopped enjoying them), it’s important to know it’s not a bad sign. We adjust, make peace, and continue to move forward.


    1. That is exactly right. We are always evolving. It’s good not to always be together anyway. There are things I am interested in now that I wasn’t before and many that I have no interest in. It’s funny how that changes!
      Most of all, we enjoy each other’s company, so we make time for that!
      Thanks for reading!


  5. Aww, that was very sweet, loved the 10 plastic rings and yes, it’s good to have lots of things in common and appreciating the differences. That’s what makes it all worth it. Congratulations and have a great one!


  6. Thanks again for lots of smiles! You’ve painted a sweet but also real picture of what makes a good marriage (and have made me wanna play outside again too). Have a lovely weekend!


    1. Playing outside is one of my favorite past times too! I am glad that you stopped by. It doesn’t get any more real than 25 years!
      Thanks and I hope your weekend is fantabulous!


  7. Awwww! 9 plastic rings? I’ll bet you didn’t see the real one coming did you?

    That is an awesome post! Brought a tear to my eye. I love to hear about couples who have been together for a long time and still love each other. Since I work for a divorce lawyer all I ever see is the opposite end of that spectrum. (sigh) It gets old fast!

    Congratulations you guys! I hope you have 50 more.

    Patricia Rickrode
    w/a Jansen Schmidt


    1. Thanks so much Patricia!
      You know, he got all nervous at the bottom of the gondola, so I got suspicious. I figured that this was it! I remember it as a pretty emotional moment!
      This is polar opposite of your job! Thank the Lord! 🙂


  8. Wonderful list Susie…one last thing that keeps me going, is each morning when my wife awakens, her eyes and her smile as soon as she awakens tells me how much she loves me… and i fall a lot deeper in love all over again! Thanks for sharing


  9. Kudos you adventurous love birds! Congratulations as well! Your secrets are definitely insightful as I continue to evolve, embrace and understand. Enjoy your trip to California! 🙂


    1. Thanks Barry!
      It has been a wild ride and I just had to share! The funny thing is that I really didn’t have to think to much about this post. It came right off the top of my head! We have a lot of fun and are each others rock when times are tough. It sounds like you have a great handle on this whole marriage thing!
      How’s the new baby????


      1. Blessings. Things are well as we are pretty chilled out and thoughtful. Long way ahead 😉 The little tiger is doing great thanks. Feeding and sleeping well. Enjoying all the moments, all over again 🙂


    1. Thanks so much for coming by! Here is a virtual toast… **clink!**
      I hope that you have continued to grow strong and healthy since your surgery!



    Funny, you share the same date as our oldest son Keaton and his wife’s wedding day, along with my hubby’s uncle and aunt. What is it about October 10th? Why did we wait until December? LOL!

    Congratulations on 25 years! It goes fast, doesn’t it? And this one is a biggie, so I’m happy that you’ve decided to spend it along the California Coast. Have a wonderful time! 🙂


  11. Happy Anniversary, Susie! Great post. Wow, your attention span is 3 minutes? I’m impressed. I get distracted after a minute…but I pretend I’m listening, then have to ask hubby to repeat what he said. You’re right, a sense of humor is a must!


  12. Happy Anniversary! xD
    And my husband used to sing “Weebles wobble, but they don’t fall down!” when I’d enter the room. 😉


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