Avoid the Big Nose, Giant Head, and Devil Eyes this Holiday Season

It is so much fun to point, shoot and instantly post your photographs on Facebook or Twitter. I really enjoy seeing them, but there are some pretty gawdawful pictures out there. Let me help you banish the bleak, delete the delinquent, and take a better photo this holiday season. Your friends and family won’t be horrified when they find themselves tagged in snapshots with enormous faces or bodies that are freakishly distorted.

Roxydoodle big nose

Don’t be the overexposed “big nose” this holiday season. Right Roxy?

Ten Tips for taking better pictures:

#1. Step away from your friends. Make sure you are at least 6-12 feet away from the subject when taking a photo and using the flash. Even though it looks like everyone has a tiny little pinhead, you can import the file and crop it down in Picmonkey. See! Their heads aren’t so small anymore. I know. It’s a Christmas miracle.

#2. a. Don’t use a flash. Try using ambient light. Looking possessed in a photo is disturbing to say the least. Even when using the red-eye feature, you can end up looking like you are in a devilish cult of aliens.

devil eye photo

My friend’s photo. Me, Richelle, Annette, Sally and Jen with devil eyes. Muahahahaha!

b. Try different settings. If there isn’t enough ambient light, set your camera for low light without the flash. Remember to reset your camera to automatic afterwards, otherwise your outdoor pictures will look like they were taken one mile away from the sun.

fun with the girls

My photo after cropping. The eye reflection isn’t as bad even though a flash was used since the photo was taken from farther away.

#3. Avoid the big-headed moon face. If you have to use a flash when taking a group picture, stand more than 6 feet away from the closest person or their face will be huge compared to the rest and will reflect the flash. No one wants to be the “big head.” See Roxy’s photo above. Every camera has a slightly different flash intensity, so experiment with distance between you and your subject to get the optimal lighting.

#4. Step away from the table. Like tip #1, only more disastrous. Never take a closeup photo of someone while they are sitting down and perpendicular to you. The edges of the photo could stretch your subject out so your poor friend or family member will look like they have an enormous butt, arm or hunchback.

Kelly big arm

My son Kelly with one giant arm and one itty bitty arm…

#5. Use the self-timer. Taking photos of yourself while holding the camera will distort you. I got a complex from all the pictures and videos I took of myself at arm’s length last summer. I didn’t realize that the camera foreshortened my face, making my nose look enormous.

#6. a. Signal to your friends before taking a picture. For example: “On the count of three. One. Two. Three.” Don’t snap it on “one” or “two” like my husband Danny. He has an itchy trigger finger. I am usually caught babbling with my mouth open.

b. For God’s sake don’t ever talk or move if you are about to have your picture taken. I did both in this picture with Louie Vito. I wrote my crazy story about him last year. Notice how Louie already knew this tip.

louie and ugly picture of me

Moving + Talking = Distorted photo

Another do over with Louie Vito

Hey. There’s always Microsoft Paint.

#7. Take pictures at eye level. Trust me. Just do it. Okay, okay. I will give you a few examples. If you take the shot from above your subject, their gray roots or bald spot could become the focal point. Again there is this crazy distortion that takes place and it could give them a giant forehead. Taking a shot from below eye level could make their nostrils look like landing docks for space ships.

Joe clowning around

My brother took this photo of himself last summer with my unattended camera. I knew I could use it sometime. Thanks Joe!

#8. Reposition your subject. If you want Aunt Merna’s new tattoo to show up in the photo, direct Uncle George to tilt his head away from her cleavage.

#9. Straighten your photos. You don’t want to look like you are on the deck of the Titanic. Your friends could get a stiff neck from looking at your photos.

Susie Lindau

Cropped and straightened photo taken with self-timer and flash.

#10. If you take one of those gawdawful nasty-like photographs, please use the delete button. So what if you are the only one who looks good. If your friends and family look like ginormous, stretched out, zombie-eyed freaks, watch your back. They are snapping a lot of holiday pictures too.

Do you take a lot of photographs during the holidays?

Do you have any tips to add to the list?

Devil-eyed photo taken with an iPhone. Other photos taken with a Nikon Coolpix S205 camera

Avoid the Big Nose, Giant Head, and Devil Eyes. Photography tips and ideas to make your subject look fantastic. Photography, tips, hacks and diys, holiday tips and tricks #photography #photographyideas #photographytips #lifehacks #pets

93 thoughts on “Avoid the Big Nose, Giant Head, and Devil Eyes this Holiday Season

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  1. How beautiful are you in that green scarf?!? Fabulous post, Susie. 🙂 My best tip is take candid shots. I love them, and borderline hate the posey stuff. You and your crew did a great job of capturing spirit and personality–wahoo! That’s, I believe, what counts.

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    1. Thank you August! My dad always takes candids and catches us with the most horrid expressions since our faces are contorted from talking or moving. I think there must be a trick to it!
      Go Christmas Spirit!

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  2. I wish I had more time to practice photography. These tips will come in handy though, now that Christmas is right around the corner and I’ll have the kids home all the time for a week! 🙂

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    1. Air Cooled Underwear, you crack me up! Hahaha! I wish there were snow drifts down here, but the snow stayed in the mountains. We only got a half inch of the white stuff. We’ve been in a drought in the Boulder Valley and Front Range. Breckenridge got 25 inches in the last week, so we will head up there to get our fix!

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  3. I always liked having the devil’s eyes in pictures when my kids were younger. It kept them in line. As time went on, my picture taking skills improved greatly…I just bought cameras for everyone else and let them do it.

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    1. Thank you so much Sheri and congratulations to you!
      I am glad that you have met other bloggers during those crazy Use Me and Abuse Me Days!
      Thanks again for thinking of me.
      I hope you are enjoying your holiday week!

      Like

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