She had fantasized about Harold since the 4th grade. After decorating her Valentine mailbox, she anticipated the insertion of his declaration of love.
The next day, he popped it inside her box without making any eye contact. Later, Lulu flew through her Valentine messages until she found his love note. “Yours, Harold.” She swooned thinking she was finally “his!” She called her girlfriends to compare notes. He had signed theirs, “Yours, Harold” too.
Years later, Lulu cruised the bars with her peeps to show off her parent’s new sport’s car. It ran out of gas. They stood on the side of road for almost an hour. Harold came to their rescue. After some subtle prodding from her girlfriends, she asked for his number.
A strawberry daiquiri was all Lulu needed to shore up her confidence. She texted him from the soda shop while her girlfriends giggled. “Thanks for the lift, Harold. I would really like to see more of you. LOL!”
This jump-started their romance.
Along with bushy eyebrows, Lulu had been burdened with helicopter parents. She never had a moment alone with little Harold. They had dated for two years without a single kiss.
Towering over him had been a turnoff. Sitting down put him at ease.
Harold took a flying leap once a day at the Wisconsin Dells for meager pay to provide for her someday. Lulu was way ahead of him.
Sneaking out to pole dance, Lulu had built up a pretty healthy nest egg of her own, along with some pretty strong thigh muscles. She stashed the savings in a satchel strapped to her garter. Both had been hidden for so long.
Harold came a-calling. Electricity shot between them the moment he entered the room. She had to have him. This Valentine’s Day, Lulu would flash him the goods.
Her parents heard every word through the paper-thin walls.
Relieved and impressed, Harold asked for her hand.
Naughty thoughts turned her ashen cheeks to crimson.
Lulu could hardly wait to show Harold what a modern woman he had married.
She knew it wasn’t nice to point and laugh, but size had never mattered to her.
Their sex tape went viral and paid for their honeymoon. It became a #1 hit on Youtube!
For the rest of their happy life, Harold took a flying leap into Lulu’s arms at least once a day.
These pictures are from a stereoscope. It was the original 3-D View-Master back in the day.
If you write a Valentine’s Day themed post, add the link to your comment!
Do you love or loathe Valentine’s Day?
Soda Fountain photo from Olde Crow’s Antiques
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I LOVED this!!
Wonderful post! I never used to get Valentine’s so all the hearts around the place over this side of the world sent to everyone is cute!
I remember one time I gave out valentines to everyone in my class, but a boy refused to take it. I thought it was because he thought it meant I liked him. But what was actually going on was that he was Jehovah’s Witness and it was against their religion to accept valentines. I thought that was kind of sad.
Well now that is quite the story. Helicopter parents? Not sure what that’s all about, but at least it had a happy ending.
Thanks for the smile.
My Valentine’s day post will be up on Valentine’s day.
w/a Jansen Schmidt
At least mine didn’t sit with me during my dates! Those were the days. My mom went through that with her parents and she dated during the 50″s.
I will look forward to reading it!
HAhahahahahilarious. your writing has certainly improved. life from the viewfinders perspective. brilliant. I bet you mute the tv and make your own dialogue up too? hahaha thank you for that one
Thanks Saint! I am always practicing! Good to “see” you..
That Lulu is a wild one!
Better watch her carefully!!!
When we get older, we discover what love really is. what we thought was love, many times turned out to be inflauation.
So true! I think Lulu found both…
Come back and leave a link at the party Thomas!
Thanks for reading my silly Valentine story!
The juxtaposition of those old-time photos and the modern day occurrences (except for the two-year wait) had me re-reading each section to keep my bearings.
The possible alternate meaning of this sentence had me rolling: “After decorating her Valentine mailbox, she anticipated the insertion of his declaration of love.”
Cheers to flying leaps and to their happy life!
Fun post. I just saw someone try to sell a stereoscope on Pawn Stars the other night. We’ve come a long way!
I kind of loathe V-Day but still go through with it for amusement. I did write a post today about it and here is the link –
Very cute! I love Valentine’s Day, love the reds and pinks, love the little hearts and the big hearts of chocolates. Love it all, but don’t require any of it on the day, I am too practical and always say, “Wait until the 15th when you can get it for 50% off!