Do you tense before being pricked by a hypodermic needle? You know it’s going to hurt, so you brace yourself. When I participated in the Polar Plunge on New Year’s Day, I stood in line tense and shivering. I had imagined it would hurt to hit the icy water, but I knew I could do it.
Having been through a double mastectomy, I know what it’s like to take the needle and wake up in icy water. Wednesday, my reconstructive surgeon will remove the hard expanders, open up the interior pockets inside my chest wall and sew them closer together. Then the soft silicone implants will be stitched into place. Yes. I’ve been tense all week.
After I splashed out of the frigid water, I dressed and ran for the car. My husband Danny blasted the heat. I took a long hot shower when I got home, but it took hours before I stopped shivering.
This time I am prepared to hunker down in the comfort of my home. I’ve downloaded a few books. The carpets have been cleaned. My nails are painted and I had my hair colored. I washed the chandelier and windows in my office and bedroom. Everything has been scrubbed.
I opted out of the fat transfer. My reconstructive surgeon wanted to take 500 cc’s of fat from my thigh and inject it around my breasts to soften the edges. I changed my mind after reading the eight pages of risk factors for the procedure. I also read that lumps can develop in a small number of women and can cause a cancer scare. I don’t want any more cancer scares.
A friend of mine went through a similar journey a few years ago. She decided against the liposuction as well. I am not burning any bridges. I can have the transfer later if I change my mind.
My doctor explained how the silicone implants are more natural than these stick-out boob expanders. (He did not use those exact words.) I think the new girls will be fine without the added fat.
I take hot showers and wonder what the new breasts will feel like. Will they feel like me?
This time the surgery won’t be as intrusive. They are using a general anesthetic, so I will drift around underwater for a few days.
My landscaper stopped by to inquire about the lawn. He asked how I was doing. I hadn’t spoken to him since the day I was high on Oxycodone and Nocor after the double mastectomy.
“I may have over-shared the last time I saw you.”
“That’s alright. I am glad to hear you are doing well.”
I told him I wrote a blog post about my one-sided conversation with him and his assistant. I had ended the story with, “At least I didn’t flash them.”
“I am going to be high on drugs again, so you better warn the workers. I may flash them this time.”
He looked at me and said, “Oh. I’ll tell them. They won’t mind.”
This time the eight weeks will rush by. During the first three, I’ll let the water swirl around my legs, hold me down and take me under. I hope to be released into the wild earlier than expected.
I can do this. I may wince when pierced by that first needle, but I will hit the glacial water and submerge into its icy flow until I plunge back into life. Danny will be there to hand me a towel.
Do you use the setbacks in your life as a time to regroup?
Susie, you have an entire army of bloggers who appreciate you, support you, are wishing you well and who love you and your work. Here’s to a fast recuperative period for you and to seeing more great posts from you soon!
Heya Sista am sorry am running late on all the blogs
How are you?
you know what you are such a lovely inspiration. To deal with hurdles and with such grace and fine humour. 🙂
You are an amazing soul love ya ♥
Thanks Soma! So are you. **muah**
Susie, You are indeed a class act.
Awww! You are so sweet Sheri! Thank you. It’s all over with and I’m feeling strong.
Hi Susie Strong – I’m a bit late and hope you are well into your recovery mode now. It sounds like you are making all the right decisions. Onward and upward … you and your boobs! ❤
Hahaha! We are! 🙂
It wasn’t anything like the mastectomy, thank the lord. I am glad it is behind me! I am looking forward to reading and writing while I rest.
Thanks again for the very sweet shout out!
Susie – I have been a little slow on the uptake this week.. I hope all is well with you. i don’t think I could have jumped into ice cold water and taken a polar plunge but we all do what we need to do, when we need to do it. Take care, get well, keep laughing… that’s what will keep you going – humor.
You made the right decision as far as the transfer goes, mama. Much love and peace.
So far, I think it was. If anything starts to look really funky, I will consider it…
Thanks Cayman! Great to “see” you!
Could you be any cooler, Susie?
Pun intended, of course!
But seriously, you’re my hero. Period.
Thanks so much Hook! It is all behind me now. I am looking forward to lots of Wild Riding Adventures in the future!
Like love, surgery is more comfortable the second time around. You know what you’re in for, what’s coming, and most importantly, you know you’re going to make it. And you know that there will be crappy days that you’ll muddle through.
Thanks so much! I was actually more nervous since the first one was so painful, but this surgery was a piece of cake!
A few more weeks and I’ll be motoring!
A shiver goes through me just looking at those pictures. You are one brave woman. I will be sending good thoughts your way and you know you will be completely surrounded by great big, WARM, blogger hugs the whole way through.
Thanks so much! It was so much easier than the first surgery. I am only on Ibuprofen!
It’s all behind me now. Smoothing sailing ahead. No. Wait. Lots of Wild Riding ahead!!!
We’re all sending you positive, healing thoughts over here in Stunted Adults land. The big question I have is whether you’ve found yourself a hot little number to wear when you debut the new girls after the drugs have started to wear off. After all you’ve been through, you deserve to take some time to show off and feel damn good about how strong and healthy all of your parts are now.
Thanks so much! It has been nearly a week and I am feeling so much better. It wasn’t very painful. I have only used Tylenol and Ibuprofen. I’ll be back to Wild Riding in no time!
I’m glad things are going well for you, Susie. Onwards and upwards.
As for the icy water, my feet – which are normally icy in normal weather – would drop off, so you wouldn’t catch me taking icy dips!
And yep, I do tend to use setbacks to regroup.
Hope everything went well with your last procedure. A good friend is currently going through the boob expander thing, too. She flashed me her boobs and she wasn’t even on drugs! I think after a certain point those of us who’ve survived cancer lose all embarrassment about our bodies. We’ve already been cut, poked, stretched, and put back together so much, we’re proud of our scars!
I think the general anesthetic affected me for a full lmonth!!! I flashed a few of my friends. Now that I am nearly clear headed, I am considering flashing everyone on my blog. They’re Barbie boobs. How offended could readers get???
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