A Canine Crime Caper

A crime of passion occurred in our house last Sunday. The result of a love so strong she would risk everything including her health and her place in society. The best of the beasts crafted and succeeded in pulling off this caper. But which beast?

tug of war

It started with a brilliant plan. It would have worked if she had only covered her tracks. She fooled all of us, for a while.

First she lulled us in a relaxed setting.

Hanging out

She used an accomplice as a decoy.

Canoeing on the pond

While we paddled in the pond, the culprit took action. The sun had set and it became too dark to navigate. We went back inside for dessert.

My daughter, Courtney, gasped when discovering the decoy, Piglet, licking pieces of a broken butter plate. My son, Kelly, had brought her along for a visit. One of the dogs had jumped onto the table and knocked the plate onto the floor. The butter had vanished. An entire stick!

Neither dog pleaded guilty. Roxy kept a straight face. So did Piglet. I accused Piglet. After all, she had been caught with the goods. She is only a one-year-old and Roxy is seven. She knows better. 

Which dog ate the butter and broke the dish? How would I ever figure it out? I needed evidence. The search had begun. I put on my detective’s hat and sniffed their snouts. 

Only one dog smelled like a butter vat at the Sun Prairie Corn Festival. ROXY! She had let her guest, Piglet, take the fall. 

The culprit

Now that the mystery was solved, I sprang to my computer to find out if she would survive the night. The first question that came up when Googling “eating butter,” was “Will I die from eating a stick of butter?” More than one person had asked that question. That is so sad in so many ways. 

I looked further and found out most dogs would get sick, but would survive to eat butter another day.

Our dog was quiet all night. I wondered if she had buried the stick of butter somewhere, like in the yard or in our couch. Maybe she didn’t eat it at all.  

Yes she did. I found out later in the afternoon, when butter took its revenge. 

Another classic canine caper case closed.

Have you ever been in denial over your pet’s behavior? Has your pet ever eaten anything they shouldn’t have?

77 thoughts on “A Canine Crime Caper

  1. Not with a pet, but with my two younger brothers (9 and 3) who were in my charge while my mother was at work. I was 10, and the 3-year old said “I didn’t hit the baseball through the fishbowl on top of the TV!” I still don’t know who did it.

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    • That is too funny. I bet it wasn’t at the time. And they still won’t confess? That is amazing that one of them hasn’t “cracked” by now. Maybe you’ll have to sit them down in a dark room and give them the “flashlight in the eye” treatment…

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  2. This so funny! Glad to hear all ended well. Our lab once ate a bowl of foil wrapped chocolate easter eggs. We knew he was the culprit when my husband found his poo shining in the moonlight from shiny foil! Thankfully he too survived to ingest other things!

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  3. Poor Roxy, glad she is OK, wow. Keep butter in high places! Our dog Zeus hurls every day for no apparent reason. A Google search says some dogs in this breed do this. Our solution: 1/2 piece of bread every day, presto! No more hurling.

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    • That’s good to know. My parents’ Collie gets an upset stomach sometimes. I’ll pass that along! The butter is on a counter without chairs. She would really have to be crafty in order to climb up there!
      Thanks John!

      Liked by 1 person

    • I know. She’s such a cold-hearted Bichon… I can still smell the butter on her. It’s permeating through her pores.
      I left out the part where I took her to the vet the next day anyway. She had a huge irritated bug bite on her flank. I bet the insect was attracted to her buttery deliciousness….

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    • Piglet is a Chihuahua mix. Yep. She survived too. I guess a few licks of butter won’t hurt a dog, but an entire stick will come back to exact its revenge.
      Thanks for the reblog, Oyia!

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  4. Our doberman had a thing for crayons. But not just any crayons, oh no. She’d only eat the Crayola Crayons in the 100 crayon pack with the sharpener built into the box. No ill effects other than making it easier to find the poop when it was time to clean up the yard – nothing like rainbow sprinkled dog poo to make the unpleasantness of scoop “dootie” (he he he, see what I did there…*ahem*)…scoop duty, I mean, more festive. 😉

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      • Funny enough, the only evidence that she’d eaten them would be the tattered wrappers scattered empty around the shredded box. Oh, and the shame faced way she’d avoid all eye contact, lol.

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        • That’s what surprised me about Roxy. I have to believe it’s because Piglet was visiting. She had no shame at all! She acted like it was a normal Sunday evening. When we were out in the canoe, I had wondered what she was up to inside the house……….

          Liked by 1 person

  5. Many years ago, my dog, Goliath, ate an entire box of Lindt Truffles — the ones in the foil and plastic wrapper with the twists at each end. At the time I didn’t know how dangerous chocolate can be for a dog (he LOVED it and stole it as often as possible). But I needn’t have worried. He pooped it all out over the next few days — all still in the foil and plastic rappers with the twists at each end.

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  6. We have finally Boxer proofed the house. Ours cleaned off an entire canape assortment when we went out back to look at the sunset. We had guests and had just laid the goodies out. Needless to say, we were worried but mostly embarrassed that our dogs were so ill behaved. ( You would think an adult Boxer could control itself even though the assortment included cheese, antipasto, crostini and crudities. Well they did leave the celery) They had no ill effects.

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  7. That butter eating fiend! Our dog has eaten many things, including cold hard cash. We found little pieces of partial Presidential faces on the living room floor and bits and pieces of various serial numbers but not enough to reconstruct a single bill. $600 that dog ate. $600 cash – paper money. I say you got off easy with the stick of butter.

    Funny story telling though. You’re quite the sleuth.

    Patricia Rickrode
    w/a Jansen Schmidt

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    • That would be more than terrible!
      Roxy used to get into Danny’s briefcase and eat paper. One time she ate all of his checks! Unlike your situation, he called the businesses and had them rewrite and send them.
      Dogs.

      Liked by 1 person

  8. Roxy is so sneaky! 🙂 Reggie once ate a sock — whole. He didn’t tear it to shreds and then eat it. He swallowed the entire sock in one piece. What is still unbelievable to me is that the sock sat in his stomach for 8 days before it “reappeared.” And in those 8 days he never missed a meal!

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  9. Our first child was a welsh terrier we named Sydney, a bright black and terrier who tested us in various and many ways. He was adored by all of our neighbors. We waffled between love and hate, even debated whether to look for him one time when he jumped the fence in our back yard. The dog had springs for legs, something that allowed him to access most any food on our kitchen counters, even though he was a medium sized to small dog. One birthday, I gave my wife a pound box of Fannie Mae chocolate, very rich cream filled delights. Mir ate two chocolates, then put the box of chocolates on her tall four door dresser in our bedroom.

    I came upstairs just as Sydney staggered and wobbled out of our bedroom door, chocolate dripping from the cute little beard on his chin. Syd had jumped to the top of the dresser, consumed the entire pound of chocolates. We shut him up in our tiled kitchen for the night, hopeful that the chocolate would not kill him. He did get sick, but survived to eat a huge Hershey bar that friends gave me for our birthday. We never learned our lessons with that dog.

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    • I have heard that about terriers. You would have to put everything behind a door of some kind. Sheesh!
      And now you have me considering another possibility. What if Piglet, part terrier, jumped onto the table and knocked off the butter dish to Roxy waiting below?

      Liked by 1 person

      • I really like the name Piglet for a dog. So appropriate for most dogs!

        My guess is that Piglet may not share. But it’s funny you mention that possibility, though, because our cat knocks food off of the counter to the floor. I swear it’s for our dog’s benefit.

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  10. First of all, Susie, I’m glad that Roxy survived The Great Gulp of Butter. Some years ago, Thurber, our family dog, devoured an entire box of See’s candy that my niece, Sweetpea, left out in the open, super easy for him to chow down and he did just that, but left all the paper wrappers. It was very scary, but my sister, Dovima, stayed up with him through the night and got him through it. He was one ill pup.

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  11. Love it Susie-you always make me laugh! I don’t currently own a dog, but I have several friends who have had to make emergency visits due to bags of chocolate. The latest story deals with my friend’s dog eating an entire bag of baby bell cheeses! He lived, but oh my, it was not pretty!

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  12. Hah bless! My springer always get most blame for naughty stuff like opening cupboards to rip paper up or towels, she is obsessed with towels we have to put them right back of the kitchen counters! Casper was only naughty as a puppy but he grew out of it, only naughty thing he does now as such isn’t exactly naughty its when he has a pinky moment with maizi and trys to hump her or too excited and well dot dot dot, she is spayed of course but still yuck! She is the older one nearly 8 in august! But she still is the naughty mischievous one, its probably because she is too smart for her own good, we have child locks on all the bottom cupboard and draws in kitchen because when my sister moved out she had a temper tantrum phase and opened them and got stuff out etc! Lol.

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    • She does sound like a handful! In our last house, our dog could use her nose to open cupboard doors. I’d forgotten about that! Our doors are flush with the cabinets now. I would be locking them up too!
      Thanks for stopping by the Wild Ride!

      Liked by 1 person

  13. Roxy probably thought “hey there is a puppy named Piglet in the house, I’m gonna have me some fun.” She has the perfect “I have no idea what butter is … what are you talking about?” face to boot. It was a win/win until that damn butter took revenge. Next time Piglet visits maybe there will be a stray burger around instead. Glad all parties had a happy ending.

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    • A burger would definitely be more easily digested.
      I think it’s finally out of Roxy’s system. I will be more vigilant with completely clearing the table from now on. I’ve learned my lesson, but I doubt Roxy learned anything at all!

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  14. Exact same thing – Danny got his snout up on the counter and wolfed down an entire stick before we could stop him. And it came back up hours later, adding insult to injury because we had to clean it up. What is it with dogs and butter?

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  15. My dog Sheba, a mix of terrier and poodle, once managed to get on top of a cabinet adjoining the stove top where a skillet full of left-over roast beef slices and gravy sat cooling. We heard the sound of her dog-tags clinking on the cast iron skillet and knew we were ordering pizza for supper that night.

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    • OMG! Those terriers are jumpers. What a bummer. They really are like two-year-old children their whole lives. I felt like the defensive parent of a child when I first saw Piglet licking the plate. “Roxy doesn’t jump on tables.” Ha! She left evidence all over the yard.

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  16. LOL Our dog when I was growing up stole butter out of the fridge. One time she did bury it. Maybe more than once. I only found it once though. We had to lock the fridge.

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    • That is amazing! I can’t imagine how your dog managed that. I thought for sure ours had buried it since she buries all her treats, but unfortunately, she ate the whole thing! Yuck!

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  17. Roxy is so cute! 🙂 A friend of ours had a mastiff that ate a cob of corn when our backs were turned at a bbq, it was only discovered when she’d stopped eating and became very lethargic. Many vet visits and hefty bills later, the corn was removed. Needless to say, at gatherings we now attach the lead to keep her away when the food is unveiled!

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  18. Hilarious!
    A dog of ours once ate an entire batch of fudge left out to cool. It comprised two tins of condensed milk, half a pint of cream, half a pound of butter, and lots of golden syrup and other stuff. Would you believe it – he didn’t even have the grace to get sick, but slept it off wearing a grin of sheer bliss.

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  19. You’re dogs are so cute! I have two chihuahuas and am fostering two other ones at the moment. It’s so funny how whenever one of them does something wrong, I can always figure out which of them it is. I just have to put on my serious voice, and all but one acts totally normal while the other puts their head down and shirks away!

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