A Tiny Tale of Terror or How to Train Your Resolutions

Many of you will innocently make resolutions for 2016 not realizing the kind of monsters they will become or the terror they will wreak. Be forewarned. This is not a tale for the faint of heart. This could happen to you.

On the first day of the year, many of us make a list comprised of all the goals we would like to accomplish. At that moment, our New Year’s resolutions are born. We point them in the right direction with a compass and strict orders to focus on the path and most of us don’t give them another thought. We assume they will find their way to achieving our goals by the end of the year. Sometimes they have other ideas.

new resolutions 2016

Many lose their way while meandering through the early months of the year without a care or a clue. Being young, restless and irresponsible they take breaks, play games, and socialize since they have an entire year to cross the finish line.

By May, the trail is undistinguishable. Covered by undergrowth and disguised with rich and colorful flora and fauna, they play hide and seek. They still don’t worry about the January 1st deadline since they still have so much time.

As the forest grows around them, a verdant canopy spreads overhead and spring days stretch into summer. In July, sparkly things streak through the sky distracting those resolutions again.

“Look! Sparkly things!”

By the time they find the path, the days have grown shorter and fall leaves swirl down to the forest floor. The resolutions grow older and wiser, but their joints ache with the change in seasons. They realize they’ve wasted time by engaging in frivolity. Their shadows stretch across the frozen ground. Once young and hopeful, they have become ancient, arthritic, and decrepit.

In November, we wake in the middle of the night to their wailing screams of terror. “We’ll never finish our goals this year!” they howl. They grip our hearts and turn our blood icy cold in panic. How did this happen? We lay awake for hours wondering what went wrong. After another sleepless night, they haunt us during the day with the same worry. “We’re running out of time. The holidays will arrive sooooooon…”

old resolutions fade

They drag their hollow brittle bones through December. We avoid glancing at their festering wart and mole-covered skin. When they breathe down our necks with the most foul and putrid breath, our eyes water.

As the last seconds of the year draw to a close, they turn to ash and blow away in the north wind.

“So long sucker!” they whisper through the skeletal trees.

The end…. of 2015

Did your innocent little resolutions became monsters in 2015? What can you do to prevent that from happening again this year?

Simple. Don’t feed them so much time. They binge on time for breakfast, fritter it away for lunch and swallow what’s left for dinner.

A WILD DECLARATION

From herein and forthwith, New Year’s resolutions will be called: 

12 MONTH’S RESOLUTIONS.

Do you feel the difference? Oh, sure. You’re thinking, “That’s a lot more work. Now I have to make 12 lists of goals instead of one.”

Ask yourself: Do you really want to make these changes? DO YOU?? Then break them down into smaller treks.

“You are more likely to accomplish the goal of walking three miles a day, than to declare you will walk a thousand by the end of next year.”

—Me

  • Make a list of small goals every day, week, and month.
  • Complete a goal and check it off your list.
  • Celebrate! Dance!
  • Post a list of accomplishments above your workspace. Even that is extra work, but the reminder will keep you plodding forward.
  • Plan breaks into your schedule. Get outside every day and stretch your creative brain and cramped muscles. You deserve it.
  • Rinse.
  • Repeat 364 times.

Remember, if you want to keep your resolutions from running wild, you have to keep them leashed and on the path so there won’t be any meandering. Make a roadmap for they are directionally challenged and sparkly things will distract them along the way. Sure it will mean more work and you will have to make a plan every day, but remember, work hard, play hard.

By the end of next year, you will be proud as you reach the end of the trail with young, vibrant, and accomplished goals in hand.

What do you think? Are your resolutions irresponsible? Do they need to be reined in? Do you avoid making any at all cost?

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89 thoughts on “A Tiny Tale of Terror or How to Train Your Resolutions

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  1. My 2015 resolutions included going rock climbing and actually not dying, and I did that. I resolved to make a new friend, and I passed that one with flying colors because I made a few new friends. And lastly, I resolved not to get hit by a bus.

    I’m golden. 🙂

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        1. I would keep your head up around busses, but that’s just me. Good luck with the book! Watch out for your resolutions. Keep them tamed and they’ll be as sweet as kittens!

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  2. 2016 is almost over but I just found you. I do and sometime I don’t make resolutions. I do make priorities annually and try to stick with them for a year, then revise in the following year. There are a couple things seem to hugh to tackle, so I procrastinate. So I’ll read your “Crush Procrastination” to get inspiration. Thank you.

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    1. I’m so glad to meet you!
      We still have time to reach our goals. I’ve “adjusted” some of mine. I figure as long as I still have my eyes on the prize, every baby step is good! Let me know if any of my crushing procrastination tips help. 🙂

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