Meet FBI Profiler, Pete Klismet and Win a Book!

Hi Daya and thank you for the question. As you might imagine, I get that question frequently. All people have to do is find out what I did in my ‘other’ life and .… ‘Mr. Klismet …….. ‘ It’s quite easy to answer ‘No,’ but there needs to be some explanation involved.

There are two answers to this question, one short and one not-so-short. The latter comes directly from Chapter 5 of my soon-to-be-released college text – “Profiling Violent Crime: A Behavioral and Forensic Analysis.” I’m hoping it will be available in bookstores as well – because a lot of people have asked me how to get a copy when it’s available in Jan of 2019. (Ok Pete….blah blah blah!!)

Here are the two versions of the answer:

Version 1. No.

Version 2.

“Criminal Minds” vs Real Criminal Profiling The depiction of profilers and the job they do in the television show, “Criminal Minds” is very
entertaining to watch, and provides a small glimpse into the idea of generating a behavioral profile
based upon crime scene evidence. However, the details of how that is actually done, is much more
fantastical than what occurs in the real world. To begin with, by the time the FBI enters a case, the
local law enforcement agency is assumed to have exhausted all leads in their investigation and
don’t have anywhere else to go with the case. The agency then asks the FBI for assistance to
generate more leads or ideas with where to head with the probe. Calling the FBI into an
investigation right from the beginning (when the crime scene is still active) is essentially unheard
of. Instead, when the Behavioral Science Unit (BSU) personnel have an opening in their schedule,
they set a date for one or possibly two of the primary case investigators to come to the FBI
Academy in Quantico, Virginia, to present their case. Or, the local police investigator(s) will gather
up a summary of the evidence in the case to take with them, or otherwise send to the FBI
electronically or via overnight mail. The detective(s) will then meet with the BSU agents for one
or two days, and return to their agency. Within several weeks, the BSU will send the agency their
profile, which will cover what they believe are the characteristics of the unknown suspect. Thus,
there are some fairly drastic differences between what the hit show depicts and what occurs in the
real world. Some of the biggest departures between the show and reality are:

1. There is no executive jet on call for the profilers twenty-four hours a day and seven
days per week. As mentioned above, it is much more common for local investigators
to be flown to Quantico or for them just to forward the case materials.

2. There is no single team of profilers who are able to respond to a crime scene in any
state at a moment’s notice. There are many experts who make up the current BSU, and
any number of them may be assigned to a given case, when time allows. If travel is
required, a single agent may be dispatched.

3. The agents in the unit do not sit around in a bay of desks waiting for a case to come in
and they then go to work. In reality, each agent in the unit may be burdened with forty
or fifty cases in individual file folders sitting on their desks or the floor nearby.

4. There is not a whole team of FBI agents in the field on a case. While the agents from
the Behavioral Analysis Unit (BAU) may consult with the Case Agent, it would be
unlikely to see more than two agents managing a case together. The chances for an
entire team of six or seven agents being out in the field on one case is virtually nil.
Rather, assistance would be requested from the FBI office in that area as well as local
law enforcement.

5. A team of agents does not march into the local police or sheriff’s department and simply
take over. They would never succeed if they don’t work closely with the investigators
who have worked on the case from day one. And, as mentioned above, it’s typically
local law enforcement who prepare the case materials (and potentially give a
presentation) – not the other way around.

6. Real-life FBI profilers seldom, if ever, personally arrest the suspects they have
identified as the offender in the crime or crimes. In fact, they may not be involved in
the arresting or actual identifying at all! The profiler’s job is to create/cultivate new
leads for local law enforcement via their profile, not to hunt down suspects. Therefore,
they generally do not get into car chases, shoot outs, hostage negotiations, disarming
explosives, confrontations with serial killers, hand to hand combat, martial arts, or life
threatening situations of any kind. They prepare and deliver reports.

7. They do not have a computer analyst/hacker who can inexplicable hack into virtually
anything within five seconds and have answers ready in ten seconds. It is not possible
to analyze the DNA of a Border Collie on a sheep ranch in Montana, hack into one of
thousands of cameras in New York City, compare these, then triangulate with a Saguaro
cactus in Arizona, and pinpoint a suspect. Plus, it would be a serious violation of federal
law to continually hack into medical and psychiatric records, which they do on many
of their “cases.”

8. There is not always a fleet of black Chevy Suburbans to drive. Yes, it looks cool. But,
in actuality, if an FBI agent is sent out into the field to consult in person, they pick up
a rental car at the airport like anyone else.

9. The person who has been killed or otherwise harmed in a violent crime or sexual assault
is not referred to as “the vic.” This is generally considered a bit disrespectful in law
enforcement circles. When possible, the victim of a violent crime should be referred to
by their name. This is an especially important habit to get into, as law enforcement
officers frequently come into contact with the victim’s family members and the media.

What the Media Gets Wrong About Criminal Profiling
What TV producers and news outlets sometime seem to misunderstand about criminal profiling is
how long the process takes, and that, depending on a multitude of factors, a profile may be
completely wrong. Profiling always works on a balance of probability, and as with everything,
there are individuals that fall outside of this pattern of probable behavior. Profiling can be a useful
tool and the more information you have on the crimes, the more accurate you can be. However, it
is very unlikely that a profiler would say with certainty that an offender is a 24-year old, white
male who plays the violin but is left handed, who also is allergic to beef and has an obsessive
compulsive disorder surrounding the number 13, after a quick look around a murder scene.
Very few of the major serial offenders who have been prosecuted in the last 50 years have
been arrested as the result of criminal profilers. The majority were either caught in the act,
confessed when they were arrested, questioned about something else, or were turned in by their
associates or loved ones. Some were convicted because the advancement of DNA testing has
caught up with them, even after forty of fifty years.

TV shows about profilers are made to entertain an audience. As such, they portray profilers as
having near superhuman levels of reasoning acumen that far exceeds what is possible in real life.
In addition, these shows always depict the murders in their series as being the work of one (or
several killers) making these shows far less representative of reality.

Conclusion While the entertainment value of crime shows on television is unquestionable, their effect on the
general population has had some unforeseen negative consequences. These shows give the public
a false impression of reality and may impact the court process when investigators are unable to
present similar evidence in the courtroom. In short, television may create false expectations in the
trying of criminal cases – especially those where there is sparse physical evidence or a lack of
funds to properly analyze the evidence available. The CSI effect and budget shortfalls continue to
have an impact our ability to successfully try cases, and it should never be forgotten that even
when forensic analysis is available, it isn’t infallible because the results are interpreted by humans.

Hope that answers your question and doesn’t sound snarky or condescending! CSI is very popular as well, and is far more hokey (well….maybe not THAT far) than Criminal Minds. If you’d like more on that, I can do some more cut ‘n paste from the chapter in my review copy.

Thanks again ……….. pete

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